Those who are stuck in the very dark cave
Can only see the shadows on the wall
Those who are exposed to the light and truth
Destined to show others out of the cave
Shackled down and oblivious to truth
One man is set free to roam the outside
He basks in reality and knowledge
Guiding others in the cave towards the light
But not everyone can adjust to light
Some may go back into the very dark cave
The cave is cozy and familiar
But one will always be oblivious
Staying in the cave may feel very right
But it will forever leave you in pitch dark
(Okay so I i just went with the 10 syllables per line thing except the last line. No iambic stuff because I don't know how to do it so tips please. Please comment thanks)
goood job! it was creative and i particularaly liked the last two lines
ReplyDeleteplease comment on mine :)http://danig14.blogspot.com/
I really like yours and I also liked the last two lines :)
ReplyDeleteI like how you talk about what happens after the prisoner is freed in the allegory. Iambic pentameter is long then short syllables. It really can only be heard when you read the poem out loud and it is a bit subjective because different people pronounce words differently. Could you please comment to my blog?
ReplyDeleteI like the tone you set, but I'm not really seeing the sonnet rhyming structure (ABAB CDCD EFEF GG). Good job getting the ten syllables though, it's tough. As for the rest of iambic pentameter...I really don't know. The stressed/unstressed thing confused me as well.
ReplyDeleteWay to go with the ten syllables! I was just a tad confused with the rhyming structure but besides that great job.
ReplyDeleteYeah who cares about the ten syllables rule, i'm not that strict, you followed the 14 line rule and had a rhyming structure that was not good but excellent, i especially liked : "Shackled down and oblivious to truthOne man is set free to roam the outside He basks in reality and knowledge Guiding others in the cave towards the light"
ReplyDeleteGood job Paul
Congrats on the ten syllables part of iambic pantameter! I agree with the others about the stressed/unstressed part because that confused me too...but this was well written and very powerful great job!
ReplyDeletei dont really understand your rhyme scheme.. but i did like the sonnet overall. Good job!
ReplyDeleteI like your sonnet. Good job! I like your use of words like "oblivious"
ReplyDeleteOther than your rhyming it was a very good sonnet overall
ReplyDeleteGreat work, I really enjoyed your sonnet. you showed strong diction and syntax
ReplyDeleteComment on mine, please and thank you
http://hjonesrhsenglitcomp.blogspot.com/2012_11_01_archive.html
I liked your sonnet I would just like to see a better rhyming structure! The last two lines are great to sum it up but I think that was one of the biggest criteria for them to rhyme in order to be a sonnet! But I think you did a great job!
ReplyDeleteGood Sonnet. would have liked to see some rhyming but it had a bigger meaning in it and it was good.
ReplyDeleteThis was great! I liked that it went through the story.
ReplyDeleteCould you comment on mine please?http://kfursterhsenglitcomp.blogspot.com/2012/11/allegory-of-cave-sonnet.html#comment-form
Great job! Your sonnet was creative.
ReplyDeletehttp://marriagarhsenglitcomp.blogspot.com/
You got the 10 syllables down! Good job Paul. I agree with Devon and also would liked to see some rhyming. You understand the Allegory and that was proven.
ReplyDeletenice job! i enjoyed reading your sonnet! nice job on 10 syllables but need rhyming more? anyway good job!
ReplyDeleteIambic...way better than any rhyming scheme, and one of the few people who remembered to do so. I like the sonnet, well made.
ReplyDeleteI concur with Ryan. Few people have even tried to use the iambic pentameter so this is a huge victory! Good job and it was a great expression of the theme in the allegory.
ReplyDeleteI enjoyed the way you almost summarized the allegory, in just the last two lines. The two choices. Enlightenment, or blissful ignorance.
ReplyDelete